Earlier today, we heard some seriously devastating news …
Briana DeJesus and Javi Marroquin had, in all likelihood, broken up.
The news wasn’t devastating because we really loved them as a couple or anything, like we’re not upset because we think true love died along with their relationship.
It’s just sad because they had some of the most interesting, messiest dynamics in the history of Teen Mom couples.
The only reason we even know that Javi exists is because he got with Kailyn Lowry, and with their quick marriage and the birth of Lincoln, he secured himself on Teen Mom 2 for the rest of all time, pretty much.
Briana, meanwhile, went from 16 and Pregnant to Teen Mom 3. That show only lasted for one season, but a few years later she was brought on to join Kailyn, Jenelle, Leah, and Chelsea on their show.
So, OK, when we see footage of Javi next season, will he be on Kailyn’s segments as usual, or will he be featured with Briana? Will it depend on who he’s with?
If Kail and/or Briana get petty and fight on the show — which, let’s be real, you know that’s coming — where will that story go?
And if Briana and Javi really did break up, where do they go from here?
Will Javi try to holler at Leah? Could Briana hit up Jeremy Calvert or Nathan Griffith?
Where does the madness end?!
Anyway, what we’re trying to say is that Javi and Briana have been delightfully ridiculous together, but it looks like that’s all over now.
As we discussed this morning, Javi changed his Facebook relationship status to “single” over the weekend, and he and Briana have both deleted all the pictures of them together off of their social media accounts.
Briana also pulled her classic move of deleting every single one of her tweets, so you know something went down.
Then yesterday, Javi tweeted “Tough weekend. Hope it turns around. Looking forward to training this week. 2 weeks away from our competition.”
Pretty vague, huh?
None of these are good signs.
And now, thanks to statements from both Briana and Javi, we know exactly what happened.
First, to just rip this band-aid off quick, it’s true: Javiana is no more.
In a statement to Radar Online, Javi said “I’m hurting a little right now. I’m upset about it.”
Instead of going into further detail about the reason behind the split, he just said that he was “just going to lay low for a little.”
But you know Briana came through with the details!
“Javi and I are not together anymore,” she began in a statement to Blasting News. “Our future just doesn’t line up.”
“He doesn’t want me to get my surgery for a breast lift, lipo, and tummy tuck (which I’m doing in two weeks) because it’ll look bad on his name at work.”
… Sorry, what?
They broke up because she’s getting some more plastic surgery and he’s not into it?
If he can’t support her choices or deal with some criticism about her choices from his coworkers about those choices (???), then the breakup is probably for the best.
Briana added that another issue between them is that she doesn’t want to move to Delaware this summer to be with him, “and for these reasons, he broke up with me.”
“I have no bad things to say about him,” she continued. “He wanted a wife and home right now and I didn’t see a reason to rush.”
“I wish him the best going forward, and I am sad things panned out this way, but this is where things currently stand. Again, we are no longer together.”
So he said that he’s hurting, and she said that he broke up with her but that she has “no bad things to say about him”?
Something tells us that this isn’t truly the end for these two dumb lovebirds …